Googling for Love

Google: (GOO.gul) v. To use an Internet search engine such as Google.com to look for information related to a new or potential girlfriend or boyfriend.

Have you Googled yourself yet? Can anyone resist? If you haven't had the pleasure, here's how:

Go to Google.com, type your name in quotation marks, and see what comes up.

A lot depends on how common your name is (like John Smith). I tend to get references to nobility (that's the Lord part), and the genealogy citations are many. But sure enough, there's my house in Maine (I rent it during the summer from an Internet ad) and stained glass courses that my husband Drew and I have taught. When I add my middle initial B, then the references are pure cyber romance. Yea!

Drew's name gets his scientific publications. If I had googled him when we were courting, I would not have made the embarrassing gaff of bragging about my publications (2). He had me beat hands down. But also, that Google search would have added to his credibility, because he is cited over and over as a scientist and connected with the Army Corps of Engineers. I would have been reassured.

But what if other connections had come up? Somebody with my name is a personnel expert. Also, it sounds as if my name is common in England. Maybe there is worse, buried under my name in the Net.

Seems like it is a good idea to be aware of what comes up if your name is Googled, sort of like keeping track of your credit report. If something negative comes up under your name and it's not you, you need to know that and be able to explain it to another. If it's not so good and IS you, you need to know and explain that, too.

While visiting some of my older relatives recently, they were quite interested in being Googled. My favorite uncle, who has an unusual spelling of his last name, shares that spelling with a rather well known gay porn star. Or at least, we assume the gay porn star and my uncle are not the same guy. The porn star does sound like he has some rather amazing physical attributes. That's the kind of Google citations associated with your name that it is good to know about!

There seems to be some embarrassment associated with Googling a prospective date or partner, but I can't see why that would be so. Unless it appears being a little too interested, like "I can't be bothered to check credentials, even though I have an easy way to do so. This person just doesn't matter that much to me." Why would you want to convey that message?

Especially if you are using the Internet for a mate search, it only makes good sense that you would use one of CyberSpace's best tools to help you make a safe and secure match.

But it also points out the need to keep one's cyber nose clean. It follows that if you are doing something that you wouldn't want anyone to know that you are doing, maybe you shouldn't be doing it.

So Google away!

Kathryn Lord © 2004 All Rights Reserved

Are You Prepared For A Night Of Passion?

You are looking for that special woman, or maybe you're just looking to find a hot babe to have a one night stand with. You head out to the bar, or club or whatever function you like doing, and you see a really hot woman in a spaghetti strap cocktail dress with silky, long-flowing hair down to the middle of her back, and she is hanging out with her almost equally as gorgeous friends. You engage the group in conversation, and the hot woman you are looking to hook up with becomes interested in your presence. She asks you to come with her on the dance floor, or the pool table, or a more secluded area to get to know you better.

You have a more personal conversation with her, and she starts giving you signals that she is attracted to you; she leans forward to you when you speak, she twirls her hair with her fingers, she gives you a radiant smile, she starts touching your arm, she holds her arms around you, etc. Soon you lean in for a kiss, and her lips passionately embrace yours. You feel the electricity of her soft lips, and soon you are kissing her face, her neck, and she becomes really aroused. She excitedly asks if she can come back to your place, and you can't wait to get her home.

As you walk up your door with her arm in yours, you invite her in, and she eagerly accepts your invitation. However, when you walk into your place, she sees the empty beer cans strewn across your living room table, the empty, greasy pizza box left on the floor, and magazines and video games left all over the room.

Her demeanor suddenly changes, and she is not so eager to stick around your place. Nevertheless, you manage to excuse yourself for the condition of your place and make her comfortable again. You then resume your passionate hookup, you start petting her in a sexy way, and she becomes really horny and begs to make love to you. You get excited and hurry into your bedroom. You start taking off her clothes, and she starts taking off your clothes as well. Soon she takes off your pants and starts begging for you to come inside her. You look around for a condom, but you can't find one to put on. You tell her that you forgot to get condoms earlier, at which point she becomes angry and pushes you away. She rushes to put her clothes back on and hurries out your front door in a huff. You beg her to say, but she tells you, "Go away! I don't want to see you again! Goodbye!"

What went wrong?

The Boy Scouts and the U.S. Army both have a motto which is used as a sacred creed:

BE PREPARED.

In this case, which happens more often men will admit, especially those men who aren't very successful at dating, is that the man wasn't fully prepared for a night of lovemaking. You may ask how he wasn't prepared if he managed to attract the woman he wanted to hook up with into coming to his place. In this case, it wasn't due to a lack of desire; it was due to a lack of physical preparation.

As the hot woman entered his place, she noticed that it was a mess. Most women are not attracted to untidy homes, especially the places of those men they are attracted to. Women often spend hours preparing themselves to go out to bars and clubs or dates, much of that time trying to pick out the outfit that makes them look good, showering, doing their hair, picking the right perfume, and applying the right amount of makeup. These women cared enough about their appearance to meet other people, and they expect the men they hook up with to do the same. Does that mean that you should spend hours getting yourself ready to hit the bars, clubs or restaurants? Not necessarily, but you should take a few steps that will have you ready for a night of passion.

1. Good hygeine. If you are planning to go out with the expectation of meeting someone for a night of passion, this is a must. You should shower and shave beforehand, wear some decent cologne or aftershave (but not too much), and clean your breath. You can do this by having breath mints or Listerine pocket packs with you when you go out.

2. Clean your home. You don't have to hire professional cleaners to come to your place and make it spotless, but you should have it tidy enough so that there are no dirty dishes, empty beer and soda cans and bottles, and discarded fast food wrappers strewn around your place. You may not have thought about those junky items around your place during the day, but a woman will notice this very quickly when she sees your place, and she may make a snap judgment about your character based on the appearance of your home. (I.e., if she sees your place being dirty and haphazard, she may believe that you are not in control of your life and will not see you as a potential mate.) Also, be very conscientious of the kitchen and bathroom areas, since she may come into those places to get drinks or freshen up. Do you really want that incrediblly hot babe to see your crusty, mildewy bathroom? I think not.

3. Have some refreshments available. Make sure that you have some thinks like coffee, soda, beer, wine and bottled water on hand. She may not necessarily want these when she comes to your place, but it is a good thing to have them available if she decides to get comfortable. If you have some wine there when she asks for it, she may even see you as more desirable for your cultured status.

4. Have clean towels and a spare toothbrush handy. If you are fortunate enough to get the hot woman to spend the night at your place, she will appreciate the effort you made to allow her to freshen up.

5. Always have condoms available. This is not just for show. Not only is this for her protection, but yours as well. You don't want or need to risk contracting any sexually transmitted disease, and you can't assume that the woman you meet is clean. And unless you are eager to settle down and raise a young child, you don't want this night to end up with an unwanted pregnancy. Don't assume that she has any condoms with her, and don't assume that she is on any contraceptives. Even if she has contraceptives, this won't protect you from possibly contracting a sexually transmitted disease.

Another note about condoms: men who haven't been very successful on the dating scene or those who have recently ended prior long-term relationships often forget to have condoms with them when they go out looking for dates. Whether they are afraid to hook up with other women, or they are "nice guys" who don't want to take advantage of women, they often set themselves up for failure by not being prepared. There's something to be said about the law of intention here: people who plan on visiting a foreign country don't just go to the airport and ask for a plane ticket.

They spend several days or weeks picking a place to visit, booking their plane ticket, hotel and rental car ahead of time, getting their passports in order, and planning an itinerary of sites to visit when they go to this foreign country. And for those people who seriously seek to become wealthy don't just tell people that they are going to make a lot of money. They have a specific financial freedom goal in mind, and they have a blueprint in place to make money, whether it involves buying and selling real estate, trading stocks and options, or selling goods on eBay.

Does it guarantee that they will become rich? No, but by having a plan in place, they bring ideas and people in place to help them on their way to financial freedom. Dating is the same way. You may not necessarily find a woman to sleep with, but by preparing ahead of time to expect a night of passionate lovemaking, you put yourself in a sexually active state, and the universe will go out of its way to attract a woman eager to get physical with you.

Our Need for Power

Admit it or not, we all have a need for power.

Power provides each of us with several very essential things; the feeling of being in control, the feeling that we're right, a sense of security and the hope that we can accomplish what we want most for ourselves.

With Mind Control there is no doubt that it appeals to that very base need for power.

Even the most introspective and peace loving have to admit that the real power of mind control comes in two forms 1) external - controlling others and the environment and 2) internal - the ability to control our own thoughts, feelings and responses.

According to J. K. Ellis of Mind Control 101, Mind Control has gotten a bad name over the last fifty years. "We've got to stop lying to ourselves and admit we are all manipulators. It's neither good or bad. It's just true and then we can start to look at mind control in a way that will benefit us."

Here is a little mind control tip that anyone can use that will appeal to both aspects of mind control.

When interacting with someone what can you do to allow them to perceive as if they have power?

A simple example is ask them to do something that is slightly outside of what they believe is their current ability. In asking that give them the support and encouragement that they need to get the job done.

Here are the benefits as they relate to mind control.

First it will demonstrate to you that you have at least some power over people and your environment secondly, and most importantly, it will demonstrate that you have some personal and internal control over yourself to do it.

The main problem with people who suffer from shyness and want control it that they are too much in their own heads wondering "What should I do next?" or telling themselves "This is stupid." In so doing they are not truly aware of their external surroundings and therefore not able to control it.

By taking charge in this small way anyone can begin to see the real benefits of mind control.

Advice For Attracting Men Online

These online dating tips for women will help you get that single man's attention, and keep it. There's a lot of competition that you will be compared to so you'll need to stand out from the crowd.

Men are easily attracted to someone just by looking at them. That is why it is important you have a good photo on your profile. This is the first thing any man will notice. If you don't catch their attention with your photo the rest of your profile is wasted. Just by uploading a clear recent photo from the shoulders up or the waist up you will have a better chance of getting your profile looked at. And your photo will stand out better than over half of the other single women's photos. You'll see lots of poor quality photos taken from too far away. These single women are trying to sell themselves with these photos, and they look like they have made no effort what so ever. So if you make the effort your photo will stand out, and get the click. By all means put other photos in your profile as well but have them as extra ones and not the main one.

The next thing the single men will notice is your username. You will need to create one that stands out. It can be based on a hobby of yours so it says something about you, and doesn't look like everyone else's. Don't use a name where you have to put a number on the end because a thousand other women are using the same name. Your name will show up in chat rooms as well, so choose one that stands out, and you will be remembered.

Fill your profile in with as much detail as possible. You don't have to write an essay for every question, but don't leave questions unanswered. Be 100% honest as well, you don't want to get caught out later because you lied in your profile. This could end any chances you had with the single you was just starting to get on with. Honesty is attractive so use it to your advantage.

With more women getting e-mailed than men you will be answering a lot of them. The ones you do answer you don't want to start writing novels back to the men. This will probably turn them off. Small attractive sentences that are sometimes a bit flirty will grab his attention. Try to reply to as many e-mails as possible. Some online dating services show what percentage of e-mails you have answered so if it's low you may put off Mr. Right from contacting you. Try not reply though to men that just send you smiles or flirts. This usually means they're on a free trial and want to get a free ride with your contact. Plus you'll probably be the twentieth one they have sent out that day.

If you follow all the online dating tips for women above you will get contacted more often than the average single woman.

Who Else Wants to Find Love Through Online Personals?

You've heard the story before. You've read books and watched movies about heroines who found true love through online dating: You've Got Mail, Must Love Dogs and a host of other Hollywood flicks aimed to feature the woes and wonders of finding love over the Internet.

It all started with the boom of the Internet eons ago then came e-mail, instant messaging and then online dating.

Whoever thought that online users would be willing to pay a membership fee to be able to browse through personal profiles online was a genius, because apparently, people are more than willing to give out their credit card numbers for this 'privilege'.

'Online Dating Defined'

Online dating services such as match.com, Yahoo Personals, eHarmony and American Singles became popular in the mid-2004.

The idea is to allow online users to browse through the profile of other users for them to "meet", first in cyberspace, then, in person. The excitement brought about by the possibility of finding one's soulmate online sold, thus, online dating was an instant hit.

Take a look at the following advantages of an online dating service:

1. You can easily find a potential friend or partner who fits a pre-defined description.

If you've ever been setup by a friend for a blind date for you, you have to admit that you will never get to know what to expect.

With online dating, you can easily save time by looking for somebody who fits the age range that you want, as well as the location and the gender of your online date.

As you browse through online personals, profiles and photos, you are bound to find somebody who catches your eye.

Once you get to know each other more through e-mail or instant messages, it will be less awkward when you finally get to meet each other in person, because there is a feeling of intimacy brought about by your chat conversations and interactions through e-mail.

2. You can choose somebody who shares the same interests.

In the movie Must Love Dogs, the main female character was looking for just that, a potential male partner who loves dogs. How more specific can you get?

With online dating, it is very easy to find somebody who shares your interests. This is because major service providers like MSN, Yahoo Personals and AOL have created a niche market specifically for a group of online users who share the same hobbies, belong to the same club or religion, are fans of the same artists, or those who read the same books, watch the same movies, play the same sports. The possibilities are endless.

Webcasts, chat conversations and message boards are additional tools which help build and forge this niche market.

Of course, there is a downside to an online dating service. First, some members of paid online dating services misrepresent themselves. They do not give out their real height, weight, or they post a picture taken years ago, when in fact they don't even look like that anymore. You can counteract this by asking your online dates for a more recent picture.

'How to Create an Online Personal Ad that will Catch your Soulmate's Eye'

You can either choose a free online dating service or pay a membership fee for a matchmaking web site. Browse through the different free online dating services to get a feel of the service that you like.

When posting your personal ads online, make sure that it reflects who you truly are. Be honest, witty and fun. Don't forget to list down the qualities that you are looking for in a partner.

Write creative taglines that will reflect your personality. Finally, to protect your privacy, do not give out your e-mail address or real name in the online personal ad. Decide whether you want to do that later on.

In the end, it all boils down to fun. If you are looking for a friend, a casual affair or a lifetime partner, what better way is there than to find the one that you are looking for online?

The Bus Stop

Go to your local bus stop. This could be a busy terminal or something smaller, and chances are you will notice people there looking a bit bored. It's an easy way to say hi, and make small talk. And unlike the library, where people are also quiet, it is preferred to make some noise.

Just be natural and vibe. Find out where they're going and go from there. If they ask you, you can say you are passing through or just waiting for a friend to show. The key is to be natural and don't hit on them.

Have a walk around and sit down near some people. If they are holding a map then you can ask them if they are lost and go from there.

If you're a tourist from out of town then this is a great way to make some friends and learn a little bit about the locals. And maybe they can recommend some good places for you to visit. And if all goes well, you may even get invited out with them.

There is nothing unusual about doing this sort of thing, as some might say. It's called being socially well adjusted and not making a big deal.

Copyright © 2006 Vittorio Norman

10 Reasons Why You Should Stay Married

While no one wants their marriage to fail, did you know that there are actually quantifiable reasons for staying with your spouse? In case you need help deciding whether to stay married or not, here are the facts:

#1 Married people are happier

In recent studies, scientists founds that married couples suffer from less depression than their unmarried counterparts. And this even takes into consideration those couples that are living together and not married. Being in a committed relationship with each other is not enough, but showing that commitment to friends, family, and the wedding DJ seems to make the bond all the more important.

#2 Married couples are more productive

While the case could be made that two people can always get more done than one, married couples seem to enjoy exploring their interests more than singles and unmarried couples. Maybe it's because you've set up long term goals and thinking that guides you through the day to day, or maybe it could be because you're both challenging each other to be better

Aspen Colorado Vacation Properties

Booking online for an Aspen Colorado vacation rental or other property is so common today with a number of people out there who prefer to take the online service for an ultimate convenience. This is the reason then that more and more companies are now establishing their own portals on the web, bringing about an easy and quick access to any Aspen Colorado vacation property. To mention but a few, below are the most well-known names on the web for Aspen Colorado vacation properties. Check these out!

FriasProperties.com

FriasProperties.com actually agrees to manage and maintain any Aspen Colorado vacation rental properties online for those who are looking for it. This company, in the first place, evaluates the interior and exterior appearance of the Aspen Colorado vacation property, as well as its construction quality and condition, including the guest amenities. They are highly committed to these tasks in order to make sure that the clients get a hundred percent satisfaction with the Aspen Colorado vacation rental properties they offer. And, it is due to such commitment that FriasProperties.com draws more and more guests year after year.

ResortQuest.com

ResortQuest.com is but another well-known portal online where you can find Aspen Colorado vacation properties and rentals easily and quickly. The Aspen Colorado vacation properties of this company primarily represent the most prestigious properties for an Aspen Colorado vacation. With their search tool, you can greatly locate and choose from two-bedroom townhomes in the heart of Aspen, including ski-in or ski-out properties in Snowmass Village, and a lot more. And, it is somehow nice to know that this companu is composed of professional sale staff who will be your personal caretaker while you are their guest to prepare the necessary itinerary.

VRAgent.com

VRAgent.com is finally out there on the web offering services for those who are looking for Aspen Colorado vacation properties. This site actually provides vacation rentals as well as condos that are available at Aspen and other ski destinations. They typically feature comfortable condos and other vacation properties to luxury villas in the Aspen area. And, through the power of their search tool, you will definitely find and book an ideal Aspen Colorado vacation property that will provide you the ultimate comfort you desire. All you need to do then is browse and choose one among their listings of Aspen Colorado vacation properties, and the company will locate and reserve your choice for your vacation getaway to the alpine paradise of Aspen.

Internet Dating

Dating has become more of a hassle than it's worth. Everywhere you turn, you hear about how someone keeps looking and can't find their Mr. or Mrs. Right. You would think with all of the different options out there that it would be easier, and not harder, to get a date in today's world. But maybe the real issue is not that it is too hard to get a date, but maybe finding the right kind of person. Today, you don't even have to leave your home to snag your next mate.

With the Internet and its millions of sites, all you have to do is take a seat and use your mouse to find someone. Of course, with the convenience comes a price. Anyone can pretend to be anyone or anything on the Internet. The guy with the picture of him posing for a body building competition, that you swear to yourself that you have just hit the jackpot with, turns out to either be very unattractive or maybe even a criminal. Not everyone is like this, but it seems to be more and more common. And what about the minors who pose as being much older than they really are?

There are several success stories out there of people meeting online through dating sites and even MySpace and ending up getting married. I'm sure that this is the thing that gives people hope that maybe they too can find love on the Net, but the odds probably aren't with them. It's much easier when you've seen the person face-to-face and know what that person looks and sounds like. Maybe some of the excitement that comes from dating on the Internet is the surprise factor. You never know what you'll get. Maybe this time the person sitting on the other end of the computer will be the person of your dreams or you'll get hooked up with someone who is rich. Surprises are a wonderful thing when they are good.

There are so many sites accessible by searching for your next fling or relationship. Some Internet sites even target specific races or persons who have a particular interest. There are online dating agencies by the thousands for friendship, romance, and even international brides. So why can't single people find someone, if there are so many resources available to them? It's no longer an old-fashioned dating scene, where you actually had to go up to someone and start a conversation. Nope, you can remain as anonymous as you want behind your computer screen. I think it is because it has become almost as a game. With so many people pretending to be someone else, rather than showing their true self, they will never allow themselves to find the right person. Also, with access to so many people, there are some that have in their mind that something better will come along any day now. These people can act as picky as they want, and know that they have the possibility of meeting millions of people throughout the world through the Internet.

Maybe in the long run it's just easier to talk to someone on the bus or in a crowded mall. There's no screen to hide behind, and you know what you're getting beforehand.

Ten Starter Tips for Romance Every Day of the Year

Wondering how to be romantic and creative with your partner or date? Perhaps you are single and interested in dating someone and want to show your interest. Maybe you are in a committed relationship and feeling burdened by work and don't have time nor the funds to whip up a second honeymoon. Either way, you care about your partner and would like to show it, but may not have a clue as to what you should be doing. Good news! I am here to provide some romantic suggestions that work for both genders. Once you read a few, you'll be able to come up with your own ideas